I don’t have nearly enough data to make that bold claim with any degree of statistical significance. Not that I would want to either! Though I have plenty of evidence to support it!
Perhaps it’s just an odd coincidence. Or, perhaps it’s a pattern. Can you imagine that marketing angle… “Eating Chinese food will keep you healthy, happy, and out of hospitals”. That slogan might need a little tweaking. Hey, I’m not a marketing guru. I’m just an ordinary guy who happens to love Chinese food… And, who has four great brothers, who enjoy this quest too to find the best Chinese restaurant on all of Long Island.
But, I’m truly blessed to have an amazing son. Mini Mee. Unfortunately in the past 15 months he’s been in hospital Emergency Rooms three times :(. Now, here’s where the story gets interesting. On NONE (zero; nil; nada; never; ever!) of those occasions were he, I, or both of us, eating Chinese food! Don’t you see the pattern? The connection? Clearly when he’s eating Chinese food, he has never (EVER!) ended up in the ER!
Is there something medicinal or magical in their dishes? Perhaps it’s the wonton soup (their version of chicken soup)? Or the spare ribs (gives him a strong bones? Adam’s rib??)? Perhaps it’s because it just tastes so darned good that we forget whatever ails us (at least for the next hour!).
Either way, and regardless of what anyone might say, or argue against my theory, I have the evidence to back me up. Eating Chinese food WILL keep you out of the ER!
Stay hungry, and healthy my friends!
Submitted for your consumption,
— Mee Magnum (“Chop! Chop!”)